The TVpocalypse Pre-season Top 25 Part 1

Rappin' David Silver

90210's death knell...Rappin' David Silver

25. The Playboy Club (Mondays @ 10pm on NBC)
Every season there are those shows that have no hope. The shows that are DEFINITELY going to get cancelled. The shows that only got made because the network couldn’t find a reality show to slide into that time slot. You know heading in that it’s going to be gone by midseason, yet you defy all common sense and you still ante up.

This show makes those shows seem like sure things.

There is a very real chance The Playboy Club gets cancelled during its’ first commercial break. So, of course, I’m in.

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24. Happy Endings (Wednesdays @ 9:30pm on ABC)
This was a midseason replacement for ABC last season. I think I read a good review of it. And I think maybe I saw a good preview for it. And I think someone might have even told me it was a pretty good show.

So I Season Passed (yes, that’s a verb now) it last year. And then I kept reading that it would probably get cancelled. And then it didn’t. And now I have a season’s worth of Happy Endings (I only wish that was as good as it sounds) sitting on my DVR waiting to be watched BEFORE I can even get into this season’s shows. Of course, something tells me I’d be able to pick up the storylines without the benefit of having viewed last season pretty quickly. And by pretty quickly, I mean by the end of the opening credits during this season’s premiere.

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23. Hung (Sundays @ 10pm on HBO)
This show is so Goddamn slow. And it’s borderline terrible. And I can’t really remember a time when I thought it was good. Yet, I am now entering my third season of watching it. The only excuse I can offer is that it goes on after HBO shows that I actually enjoy, and I’m too lazy to change the channel and find something else to watch. First I say, “Hello, my name is Scott, and I have a TV problem.” And then you say, “Hi, Scott!”

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22. American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior (Mondays @ 9pm on Discovery)
I’m about 74.8% certain that the Discovery Network has orchestrated the entire Teutel family feud. Without the brawl, the split into two companies, and the awkwardly painful father/son dynamics, this show would have been relegated into “oh wait, these are actually new episodes?” territory ala Dirty Jobs and other completely formulaic serial shows on cable networks about 2 seasons ago.

Despite this, I still find myself going through spells where this show starts building up 3 or 4 episodes in the DVR queue…and not really caring that that has happened. That’s probably not a good sign.

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21. Gossip Girl (Mondays @ 8pm on The CW)
As a seasoned veteran of the Beverly Hills, 90210 franchise, I can tell you that I have some very real concerns for Gossip Girl. We are one main character trying to get a record deal away from this show entering the same sad state of affairs that 90120 entered during it’s personal Death March of Bataan some 11 years ago.

Yep, that was only 11 years ago. Of course, the show was dead for about 3-5 years prior to that, but no one had the heart to tell them. It’s almost as if FOX was just pulling off some giant Weekend at Bernies scam on its’ viewers as they dragged the corpse formerly known as Beverly Hills, 90210 around until any and all signs of life had finally shriveled up and fallen off of it. (“The prosecution would like to call 58 year-old Ian Ziering to the stand….and the prosecution rests”).

The mere fact that as you’re reading this, you’re no doubt saying to yourself, “Yep, I could see Serena launching a music video this season” is really all you need to know about the dire state this show is in.

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Check out part 2 of the TVpocalypse Pre-Season Top 25 poll !

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About Scott Cocchiere

I'm the Creative Director at Citizen Relations. I love my daughters, Springsteen, as well as what some would argue to be an unhealthy amount of TV. You can follow me on Twitter: @scocchiere.

Posted on September 20, 2011, in TVpocalypse Pre-Season Poll and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Brilliant, dude. The Ian Zierling bit made it for me. Is American Pickers going to make the list? Or Chopped? Those aren’t shows I’m necessarily excited about, but somehow I’m always watching them…hmm. Maybe they need their own category.

    • It’s funny, I was actually considering the whole “own category” thing myself. There’s a ton of those cable shows that I don’t necessarily DVR, but watch quasi-religously. Storage Wars, Dog Whisperer, Cake Boss (of all the shows I watch, this might actually be the most embarrassing since I think it sets the Italians of NJ back the furthest (yes, even further than Jersey Shore…and yes, that was a double parenthetical thought)) and many more. I think you’re on to something, there might need to be a future post dealing with this phenomenom.

  2. Happy Endings is definitely worth the time. Great characters and good writing.

    My current burning question is whether or not SVU will be worth watching without Det. Stabler.

    • I think I’ve seen the equivalent of about 4 seasons of SVU (which represents about 2% of the 972 collective seasons of all of the SVU derivatives out there). But amazingly enough, all of that viewing has been in reruns. I’ve never watched an SVU during a live new season. That being said, if I were a fan, I would have some very real concerns about a Stabler-less SVU.

  3. To add to the 90210/Gossip Girl warning. One (of many) 90210 jump the shark issues was when Kelly stopped being slutty and started being self-righteous (and extremely annoying). Let’s hope Serena doesn’t follow the same path. We may have start a chart mapping the correlation of # of people Serena sleeps with and the quality of the show.

  1. Pingback: The TVpocalypse Pre-Season Top 25 Part 2 « TVpocalypse

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  4. Pingback: The TVpocalypse Pre-Season Top 25 Part 5 « TVpocalypse

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